1. |
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I still see your eyes as I stare into the snowfall
In the faces of the people as they fall
Head over heals.
For that feeling that we call home.
I just wanted you to know that I still haven't seen a proper sunrise and my view of this place this town is almost as dark as the fire that burned in your eyes.
Because I'm afraid to lose you again.
And if every you wanted to show your face again
Just to say hello
And retrace the footsteps
And reconverse in these feelings that we called home
Then I hope that you know that Id greet you with open arms and a heart full of love.
If there is a heaven I hope you're having a good one.
If there is a heaven I'm calling out for you.
I cant do this without you.
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2. |
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Sick and slender in a four walled room
Waiting for your voice to calm my stress tapped feet
Hours pass and time begins to fade as I find myself
Knee deep in a pool of my own filth with my emotions running high
How did I get this far?
The stress travels from my head to my heart.
Its pushing through the tiles and ripping the floors clean.
So just tell me,
Whose bed are you sleeping in tonight?
Please tell me you made it home all right
I’m worrying more than I want to.
Just tell me when you rest your head
Do you feel me lying with you?
Just tell me when you rest your head
Because I don’t feel you next to me.
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3. |
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Do you remember when we would walk through the forest till we found water?
Not deep enough to swim, but deep enough to move our love in new directions
We built a dam until the water touched my knees
A feeling that I only feel in memories
We were younger then
But these pictures lined the walls until the day I moved out
You never come around anymore
You never come around
Do you remember when our skin would start to callous?
And the December air would keep us huddled to a flame?
Don’t let them pull you down
Don’t let me hold you back
Just show me the love that I still know that you have.
You’re always on my mind.
I’m just a phone call away all the time.
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4. |
Lake Eola
03:34
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If I start to fall asleep driving through Florida
It’ll be in a car next to you
Because this hot air at our windows offers nothing else to do.
At least we’ve got each other on this long drive home.
So with Bon Jovi on the tips of our tongues
And salty air in our lungs
There is no telling if we’ll make it home tonight.
If we make it’ll be through the company we keep
And the sing alongs from memory
“cuz I cant get you out of my head”
And the distance gets the best of us
And we live through 45s because
You’re the only one I’d ever fly to Florida for
So if we don't make it then just know
If there was a song I would sing until the day I die
It would be about how Id never forget you
If there was a song I would sing until the day I die
It would be about how I’m happy that you’re alive.
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5. |
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There is something about the way you say hello
And something in the wind as it whispers the time
As we fiddle through the streets with our fingers entwined
We watched the moon fall and crash with the best of intentions
And I sing my songs to silence, but you still hear the words.
You said you gave me everything
I hope I can give you the world
And It took me a year to realize
That the snow had finally stopped
And I couldn’t give you anything at all.
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6. |
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The leaves have fallen again
And you’re no where to be found
I know your heart it changes with every autumn
But there’s no trace of you in this town
I hope it snows this year in Asheville
So your window gets fogged from the cold
Where ever life takes you
Just know there’s a place to call your home.
We can only sleep with ghosts for so long
Before we’re one ourselves
And though I promise you’ll move mountains
I’ll never break through your walls
So just know that wherever you find comfort
I’ll always be there in the fall
So just know that wherever you find comfort
I’ll always miss you in the fall
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7. |
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We sat watching the grass embrace the swings
Until their outstretched arms touched the stars
And our hearts never beat in step with our feet
As we traveled their tightly stitched seem
We’ve felt the snow take rest in the cracks in our eyelids
And we’ve listened to our bones speak in whispers,
“We were never entitled to our bodies
They’re just the roots connecting our souls to the earth.”
One day we’ll leave our bodies for the night sky
Where we’ll live forever as silhouettes.
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8. |
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Don’t you wish that lies could forget everything?
Because these paper-thin walls hold back nothing
In a house that’s been burning for too long
And I’ve never stuck around to see this town turn its back
I’ve just followed empty street signs in the dark
Never questioning my direction
I’ve never questioned anything.
And I promised to never write you
This much is true
This song will never title your name
And I promised to never write you
This much is true
Ill never write your name in black or blue.
And when these street signs start taking shape in heartbreak
Ill start questioning you
Because if you take the middle states between my dreams and what is real
All that’s left is bloody snow and promises
All that’s left is bloody snow and fingerprints
All that’s left is you
My house is left in shambles
Along with my heart
A little piece of me died
And I don’t know where to start with the mess we made.
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9. |
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You’re worth it
Was the last thing that I told you
The last that I saw you was the first day with my
Eyes wide open
Nothing was holding me back
From screaming my lungs out
Down 87
What the fuck am I doing here?
Because I can’t turn these thoughts into words
And I can’t turn these words into actions
Because I’m a little bit lost
And I’m a little bit scared
Because it’s just me.
And I’m alone
As I’m steering this car in whichever direction
Feels closest to home.
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10. |
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This apartment’s not as cold
As when you left it
But I still see your ghost
Crawling around my bedposts.
I’m caught in winded breaths
Evaporating my lungs bit by bit
Until I suffocate myself
These days don’t pass fast enough
And these nights are no longer relaxing
And I still start shaking when your arm passes the soft spot on my neck.
I hope you never feel at home inside of your own skin.
I hope you never feel at home again.
You’re becoming the world and everyone in it.
O, how I hate the world and everyone in it.
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Tyler Daniel Bean Burlington, Vermont
Over a decade, Tyler Daniel Bean grew from a person and a guitar into a community of twenty or so friends from around the US. Ten releases and 350 odd shows later, they have primarily paused. But the core of the music remains: it is recognizing that functioning in the face of fear is striving to be human; it is finding a way to say "I want to live," even recognizing the relentlessness of it all. ... more
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